They gave him twenty minutes, but all he took was ten.
Now there’s a master speaker and a leader among men.
His diction wasn’t perfect, he hemmed and hawed a bit.
But what he had to say made sense, and when he was done, he quit.
At first we sat dumbfounded, then cheered and cheered again.
For you see, they gave him twenty minutes, but all he took was ten.
I want to thank Mike for that wonderful, if overstated, introduction. I am reminded of what my old boss, Dale Bumpers, once said after listening to an equally fulsome introduction. He said, “I could have listened to that all night. And for a while I thought I was going to.” –Judge Richard Arnold
I really want to end with something positive, but I can’t think of anything positive to say. Would you settle for two negatives? --Woody Allen
When friends told Cicero that he was the greatest of orators, he replied, “Not so, for when I give an oration in the Forum people say, ‘How well he speaks!’ but when Demosthenes addressed the people they rose and shouted, ‘Come, let us up and fight the Macedonians!’” --Henry Weihofen
Dean Sullivan telephoned me a while ago and asked me whether I believe in free speech. That is like asking someone whether he believes in democracy, or apple pie. I responded, “Of course I believe in free speech.” “Good,” he replied. “We want you to come and give one.” He also told me, “Keep it short. Don’t try to be funny; don’t try to be witty; don’t try to be engaging. Just be yourself.” --James D. Gordon, III
Shakespeare said, “Brevity is the soul of wit.” Dorothy Parker said, “Brevity is the soul of lingerie.” I say, brevity is the soul of an after-dinner meeting and I hereby declare this meeting at an end. –Daniel R. White
As he rose to address the group, Justice Scalia said he felt “like the man who comes home drunk and tries to sneak into the house, but loudly falls face down on the carpet.” Confronted by an angry wife demanding an explanation, the man says, “I have no prepared remarks, but will entertain questions from the floor.”
The mind is a wonderful thing. It starts working the minute you’re born and never stops working until you get up to speak in public. –Roscoe Drummond
I’m reminded of the fellow wrongly accused of rustling cattle. Just before the mob strung him up, he was asked: “Do you have anything to say?” It was clear that they were going to hang him in any event. So he responded, “I’m here to be hanged, not to give a speech.” --Conrad Teitell
Some people have a way with words and others … have not way. –Steve Martin
I was President Carter’s speechwriter, a job that my predecessor, James Fallows, once likened to being F.D.R.’s tap-dancing teacher.
A tip if you give speeches: Never start out with a canned joke. Or a joke of any kind, unless you are dead certain you’ve read the room perfectly. A better way to start any speech is with a question. Asking a question does three things, all good. One, it makes the speech about the audience, not the speaker. Two, it helps the speaker get a “read” on the audience. Three, it is a wonderfully calming way to start a speech. It kills the fear that one will stumble out of the gate. That used to be my own biggest speech fear until I learned the trick of starting with a question. –Rich Karlgaard
I’m good for five minutes of superficial charm, after which I can see the pity forming in men’s eyes. –Kinky Friedman
Vice president Dick Cheney gives speeches that are so barren of any effort to charm or persuade that the delivery alone seems to reflect contempt for democracy. –
